The Christmas Parrot: A guy walks into a store for some last-minute Christmas shopping, and sees a parrot for sale. He asks the clerk what the parrot's name is and the clerk tells him its Chat. He also tells the man that t

The Gorilla Golfer: A guy walked into a pro-shop with a gorilla. "Is anyone interested in a little wager?" he said, flashing some large bills around. "I've got $500.00 here that says my gorilla can hit the ball longer an

Walkin' in a Doggie Wonderland: Dogs tags ring, are you listening'?In the lane, snow is glistening'.It's yellow, not white -- I've been there tonight,marking up my winter wonderland.Smell that tree? That's my fragrance.It's a sign f

Dumb Crooks Roundup: BETTER HOLD ON TO THOSE PANTIES...THEY COULD COME IN HANDYA repeat offender got a life sentence for a small-time shoplifting caper in Jupiter, Florida. The man stole $49.73 worth of boxer shorts, pant

Obnoxious Parrot on an Airplane: A man gets to his seat on the plane, and is surprised to find a parrot strapped into the seat next to him. Once in the air, the stewardess comes round, and the man asks her for a coffee, whereupon the

The Pheasant's Special Diet: a pheasant was standing in a field chatting to a bull.“i would love to be able to get to the top of yonder tree,

Golfer Goes to the Emergency Room: A man staggers into an emergency room with two black eyes and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat. Naturally, the doctor asks him what happened. "Well, I was having a quiet round of golf wit

Teacher's Pet: On the last day of kindergarten, all the children brought presents for their teacher. The florist's son handed the teacher a gift. She shook it, held it up and said, "I bet I know what it is

Vet: A man runs into the vet's office carrying his dog, screaming for help. The vet rushes him back to an examination room and has him put his dog down on the examination table. The vet examines the still,

Gator Bite: A guy walked into a bar with a pet alligator by his side. He put the alligator up on the bar and turned to the astonished patrons. "I'll make you a deal. I'll open this alligator's mouth and place my

You Might Be A Redneck...Thesaurus: You might be a redneck if you think a thesaurus is a dinosaur!