All you can drink: A man walks into a bar, sits down on a bench and orders a cold one. He swigs down the beer, looks in his pocket, cringes and orders another. He gulps down that one, looks in his pocket again, cringes

All I want is a beer!: A man was out of town on business. While sitting around his hotel he became bored. So he thought to himself, "Hmm, a beer would be really nice right now." So he began to wander the streets of the unfa

Alaskan drunk goes fishing: A drunken guy in Alaska decides to go ice fishing. So he packs up his stuff and goes out onto the ice. He starts sawing a hole in the ice, and a loud booming voice says, "YOU WILL FIND NO FISH UNDER T

Accidental bonding: A man and a woman were involved in a terrible car accident and both cars were totaled. They climbed from the wreckage and the woman stood in awe. "Our cars are demolished, yet we walk unharmed. This m

A nun? Drinking!: Sister mary katherine lived in a convent, a block away from jack's liquor store. one day, in walked sister mary katherine and she said, "oh jack, give me a pint o' the brandy." "sister mary katherine,

A good bud is hard to find: Q: What's the difference between men and beer? A: When you're done with the beer it's still worth 5 cents.

A drunk asks a priest: A man who smelled like a distillery flopped down on a subway seat next to a priest. The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half-empty bottle of gin was sticking out

A cop pulls jenna bush over for speeding: A cop pulls Jenna Bush over for speeding and he notices her eyes are red. He says, "Gee, your eyes look red. Have you been drinking?" Jenna replies, "No officer, but gee, your eyes look glazed. Have y

15 signs you drank too much: 15 - You spent Sunday night in jail for cow tipping

12 shots: A guy goes into a bar, orders twelve shots and starts drinking them as fast as he can. The bartender says, "Dang, why are you drinking so fast?" The guy says, "You would be drinking fast if you had wh

"Hey, nice tie'': A man walks into a bar, sits down, and orders a drink. "Hey, nice tie!" comes out of nowhere. He looks up at the bartender to see if he had said anything, but since he was on the other side of the bar