The bartender and a Man: A man goes into a bar and seats himself on a stool. The bartender looks at him and says, "What'll it be buddy?" The man says, "Set me up with five whiskey shots, and make 'me doubles." The bartender d Ready to Go Home Yet: There was a guy in a bar and he asked the bartender for a beer. He chugged it, looked into his pocket, asked for another beer. Which he chugged, then looked into his pocket, and asked for another beer Trick Alligator: This guy goes into a bar leading a half-sized alligator on a leash. The bartender yells at him, "You can't bring that animal In here!"The man says, "This isn't just any old alligator, he knows tricks. The counter-lunch: There once was this guy who walked into a bar and ordered a counter-lunch. When his meal arrived he noticed a pile of peas on His plate. The man stares at them for a moment and than proceeds to tell t Kiss That Horse': A cowboy rides his horse to a saloon and kisses his horse on the butt before coming in and asking for a drink. The bartender Serves him and asks him why he did that."I have chapped lips.""Does manure All You Can Drink: A man walks into a bar, sits down on a bench, and orders a cold one. He swigs down the beer, looks in his pocket, cringes and Orders another. He gulps down that one, looks in his pocket again, cringes Dyslexic: A dyslexic walks into a bra.... Ventriloquist and th: A ventriloquist had just finished his polack joke routine when a huge, drunk polack confronted him, ''i'm sick of your polack jokes and i'm going to knock the s*** out of you.'' ''i'm sorry, it was al Gold Bar: A man went out drinking with his friends and came home the next morning to find his wife waiting for him. He apologized for worrying her but proceeded to tell her that he had been in the most elegant Bar pickup: While nursing a drink at a bar, a young woman was distressed to see a drunken unkempt man sit down next to her. "say, honey-baby ... i'd really like tiger into those pants o’douis." "thanks," she shot Drunk Lady In Bar: A lady stumbles into a bar. She says, "Beer tender, give me a dribble martini, and put a pickle in it."He gives it to her, and she drinks it down.She says, "Beer tender, give me another dribble martin |