Punishment in Heaven: Three friends die and go to heaven. The first guy gets handcuffed to one of the ugliest girls there. ''Why?'' he asks. St. Paul replies, ''When you were nine you killed a bird with a stone.'' The same Dolly Parton's Kids: Q: How can you find Dolly Parton's kids in a crowd? A: They're the ones with the stretchmarks on their lips. Having to Take a Whisper: Once there was a liitle boy in church. He had to go to the bathroom so he told his mother, ''Mommy, I have to piss.'' The mother said, ''Son don't say piss in church. Next time you have to piss, say, Stone Surprise: One day there were two boys playing by a stream when they saw a woman bathing naked. All of a sudden one of the boys took off running. The other boy took off after his friend. After he caught up to hi Children and Cars: Children in the back of the car cause accidents. Accidents in the back of the car cause children. Zip, Dick and Pee: There were once three boys in a classroom called Zip, Dick and Pee. Their teacher went out of the classroom so they decided to get up to some mischeif. Zip got on top of the cupboard, Dick got inside Children's Games: A little boy runs into his house and asks, "Mom, can little girls have babies?" The mom answers, "No, of course not." The little boy runs outside, yelling, "It's ok, we can play the game again!" Sex Relatively Speaking: "Dad," asked son, "What's that shriveled up old thing on Grandma ?" Dad replied "That's Grandpa". Chores on the Farm: A young boy comes down to breakfast one morning. His mother asks, "Have you done your chores yet?" "No," replies the boy, "but could I have breakfast first?" "You know the rules, go outside and clean No Punishment: Boy: Will you punish me for something I didn't do? Teacher: Of course not! Boy: Good, cuz I didn't do my homework! Lipstick at School: According to a news report, a certain private school in Washington recently was faced with a unique problem. A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bat |
