Mommy, Mommy!: "Mommy, all the kids at school say I'm a werewolf! Is that true?" "No, of course not. Now shut up and comb your face."

LSD Cocktail: Q: What do you get if you cross LSD with birth control? A: A trip without the kids.

Smoke Rings: Three little boys were sitting around talking about their fathers. The first boy said, "My dad can blow smoke rings." The second boy said, "My dad can blow smoke rings out of his nose." The third boy

Kite Tails and Rejection: One day a father and son are flying a kite. The kite is going in circles and crashing. The father comforts the son and the mother yells, "ou need more tail!"The father then tells the son, "Son, I will

A lady and her baby...: A lady and her baby get on a bus. The bus driver looks at the lady, and then her baby, and then screams, "AHHHH! That's the ugliest child I've ever seen in my life!" The lady then, totally disgusted,

A little boy wrote to Santa ...: One day, a little boy wrote to Santa Clause, "Please send me a sister." Santa Clause wrote him back, "Ok, send me your mother!".

God's Identity: One day a little boy asks his mom questions about God. He goes up to his mother and asks, "Mom, is God boy or girl ?" Not really know what to say the mother just says, "Well, son, he's boy and girl."

After School Snack: Why did the boy eat his homework? Because his teacher said it was a piece of cake.

Birdman: Little girl: "Why does your son say, 'Cluck, cluck, cluck?'" Mother: "Because he thinks he's a chicken." Little girl: "Why don't you tell him he's not a chicken?" Mother: "Because we need the eggs."

Attention Shoppers!: Why did Michael Jackson rush to Wal-Mart? Because he heard kids pants were half-off!

Stayin' Alive: A cowboy told his grandson the secret to a long life. He said, "You gotta sprinkle a little gunpowder on your oatmeal, see. If you do, you'll live to a nice ripe old age." So the cowboy did this relig