Biting your fingernails!: Little Jimmy bit his fingernails all the time. His parents tried everything to get him to stop, but to no avail. Finally, his mother, exasperated, decided to tell him a little white lie to get him to Money through Congress: One day a boy asked his mother for 100 dollars to buy a toy. She said NO. So he wrote a letter to GOD asking for a 100 dollars. When the letter got to the post office they figured that GOD meant the p 10 signs to see if your kid is a nerd.: 10. Likes people that oppress him: teachers, parents, principals, police, and authority figures. 9. Is overly enthusiastic about 'Dungeons and Dragons' and other role playing games. 8. Very familiar w Bad news/Good news: Mother to teenage daughter: "The bad news is, we're moving to a different city. The good news is, your new school is full of boys who didn't see you get sick in the cafeteria last month." He wanted to be a cool cat: Q: Why did the cat sleep with a fan on? A: He wanted to be a cool cat. Put them in a barking lot: Q: What is the best way to keep dogs out of the street? A: Put them in a barking lot. You can count on me: Q: What did the adding machine say to the cashier? A: You can count on me. Why do two skunks argue?: Q: Why do two skunks argue? A: Because they like to kick up a stink. He called a toe truck: Q: What did the elephant do when he hurt his toe? A: He called a toe truck. The letter "g".: Q: What do you find at the end of everything? A: The letter "g". What is a volcano?: Q: What is a volcano? A: A mountain with the hiccups. |