25 Ways To Confuse Your Professors: 1. Brush your teeth during class. While doing so, raise your hand as if you have a question, and mumble your question incoherently while brushing, spewing toothpaste all over the place. If your profes

10 Things To Do At School When Bored....: 1. Take off your socks, and make hand puppets. When asked a question throw your hand up and answer through your socks. Have one puppet accuse the other of having the wrong answer, and let them argue.

15 Signs You're Not Graduating This Term: 15. You planned on being there, but they moved the trial to Denver.14. You're on a football scholarship at Oklahoma.13. You get a snide letter from Admissions recommending a summer course in "Remedial

Grad Student Check List: 6:30 am Wake up and lie awake in bed.6:31 Realize you spent $18 on last night's dinner, means no eating out for the next 6 weeks.6:32 Hit snooze button. Go back to sleep.7:00 Wake up suddenly with hea

The Top Ten Lies Told By Graduate Students: 10. It doesn't bother me at all that my college roommate is making $80,000 a year on Wall Street. 9. I'd be delighted to proofread your book/chapter/article. 8. My work has a lot of practical importan

Top Five Lies Told By Teaching Assistants: 5. I'm not going to grant any extensions. 4. Call me any time. I'm always available. 3. It doesn't matter what I think; write what you believe. 2. Think of the midterm as a diagnostic tool. 1. My othe

Top Ten Things NOT To Say During Your Thesis: 10. ta-daaaaaaah! 9. wow, i got soooooooo s*** faced last night! (dr. paul's preferred line) 8. like, are you gonna scale these? 7. oh, yeah? we'll, what do you know, anyway? 6. are you ready to rumbl

Strange Computer: For a computer programming class, I sat directly across from someone, and our computers were facing away from each other. A few minutes into the class, she got up to leave the room. I reached between

Letter: Dear Mom and Dad:It has now been three months since I left for college.I have been remiss in writing this and I am very sorry for my thoughtlessness in not having written before. I will bring you up t

Mistake: If God makes a mistake, it is fate.If a barber makes a mistake, it is a new style.If a driver makes a mistake, it is an accident.If a doctor makes a mistake, it is an operation.If an engineer makes a

TYPICAL: Three men were due to be executed one day - one University of Alabama graduate, one Florida State graduate and one Auburn University graduate. The Alabama grad was the first to be brought in front of