DUBLIN WAZZUP: 1. If you have ever price shopped for Top Ramen, you might be a college student. 2. If you live in a house with three couches, none of which match.3. If you consider Mac and Cheese a balanced meal.4.

DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?: It was the final examination for an introductory Biology course at the local university. Like many such freshman courses, it was designed to weed out new students, having over 500 students in the clas

ENGLISH IS A STUPID LANGUAGE: Let's face it, English is a stupid language. There is no egg in the eggplant. No ham in the hamburger. And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple. English muffins were not invented in England. And Fr

COLLEGE HABITS TO BRING HOME: 1. Try to use your dorm key to unlock your bedroom door.2. Have your mom scan your ID card for meals.3. Look for a tray to carry your dinner to the table with.4. Walk two blocks to go to dinner.5. For

BEEN IN COLLEGE TOO LONG WHEN...: You consider McDonald's "real food." You actually like doing laundry at home.4:00 AM is still early on the weekends.It starts getting late on the weeknights.Two miles is not too far to walk for a part

ORGAN THAT EXPANDS TEN TIMES: Sixth grade science teacher Mrs. Samson asks her class: "Who can tell me which organ of the human body expands to 10 times its usual size when stimulated?" Nobody raises a hand, so she calls on the fi

RULES FOR COLLEGE ROOMMATES: 1. If someone calls while you are on the phone, do not answer the call waiting signals, after all your conversation to your boyfriend's, cousin's, sister's, ex-best friend's, father-in-law's, stepson

FUN THINGS TO DO ON FIRST DAY OF CLASS: 1. Smoke a pipe and respond to each point the professor makes by waving it and saying, "Quite right, old bean!" 2. Wear X-Ray Specs. Every few minutes, ask the professor to focus the overhead projecto

MATH THEOREM OF PYTHAGORAS: There were three medieval kingdoms on the shores of a lake. There was an island in the middle of the lake, which the kingdoms had been fighting over for years. Finally, the three kings decided that th

DOLLARS EQUAL TEN CENTS: Theorem: 1$ = 10 centProof:We know that $1 = 100 centsDivide both sides by 100$ 1/100 = 100/100 cents=> $ 1/100 = 1 centTake square root both side=> squr($1/100) = squr (1 cent)=> $ 1/10 = 1 cent Mult

IMPROVE YOUR ENGLISH WRITING TIPS: 1. Avoid alliteration. Always. 2. Never use a long word when a diminutive one will do.3. Employ the vernacular.4. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc. 5. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) ar