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Family Jokes

Haunted house: A ghost was sitting in a haunted house all alone when another ghost came in. It said, "Hello, I'm your long lost brother

Pregnant sister: Mother: What are you doing with that saw and where's your little brother? Youngster: He, he, he's my half-brother now.

Young witch from Nantes: There was a young witch from Nantes Who hated each one of her aunts So she buried the lot In her vegetable plot And grew some remarkable plants.

Antifreeze: How do you make antifreeze?Hide her nightdress.

Crazy Aunt Maud: Crazy Aunt Maud received a letter one morning, and upon reading it burst into floods of tears. "What's the matter?" asked her companion. "Oh dear

New rear-engine European car.: Auntie Maud bought herself a new rear-engine European car. She took an old friend for a drive, but after only half a mile the car broke down. Both women got out and opened up the front of the car. "Oh

My aunt has a sore throat: My aunt has a sore throat. What should she do? Take antiseptic !

Aunt Edna: My Aunt Edna is so fat, Uncle Tom has to stand up in bed each morning to see if it's daylight.

Double chins: My Aunt Helen has got so many double chins it looks like she is peering over a pile of pancakes.

Slug in your aunt's bed?: Mother: Fred, why did you put a slug in your aunt's bed? Fred: Because I couldn't find a snake.

Stern aunt: A rather had been staying with Fred's parents, and one day she said to the little girl, "Well, Fred, I'm going tomorrow. Are you sorry?" "Oh yes, Auntie," replied Fred, "I thought you were going tod

 
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