NAMING THE BABIES: A man was taking his wife, who was pregnant with twins, to the hospital when his car went out of control and crashed. Upon regaining consciousness, he saw his brother, a relentless world-class practic

CAMP NO-NO'S: Here's a list of camps you may NOT want to send your kids to:Tommy Lee's Camp Kickachick.Monica Lewinsky's Camp Suckaweewee.President Clinton's Camp Getahoochie.Ellen DeGeneres's Camp Lickacoochie.Ken

Drunk and sleepy: A husband came home late in the night, drunk and sleepy."Where have you been?" the wife demanded."You're so smart, darling. Can't you invent a good answer yourself?"

A MOUTH FULL: A man calls his mother in Florida. "Mom, how are you?""Not too good," says the mother. "I've been very weak."The son says, "Why are you so weak?"She says, "Because I haven't eaten in 38 days."The man

But be reasonable: In the middle of night, a wife woke her husband, "Darling, it's so cold!"The husband jumped out of the bed, brought one more blanket from a closet and carefully tucked it around his wife's body. After

FAMILY STRESS TEST: How to score: 0 if the statement is never true, 1 if it is rarely true, 2 if it is sometimes true, and 3 if it is always true.1. ___ Conversations often begin with "Put the gun down, and then "we can

THE FISHERMAN'S SONS: One day many years ago, a fisherman's wife blessed her husband with twin sons. They loved the children very much, but couldn't think of what to name their children. Finally, after several days, the fi

British attorney: A young British attorney came to his office all in bruises and scratches. "What happened to you?' a colleague asked."Oh, it's some bloody story. Yester eve, I came home from the club, and what I see i

SONS: Four guys were telling stories in a bar. One guy leaves to go to the restroom. Three guys are left... The first guy says, "I was worried that my son was going to be a loser because he started out wash

THE INHERITANCE: Two friends meet in the street. One looked forlorn and almost on the verge of tears. The other man said, "Hey, how come you look like the whole world caved in?"The sad fellow said, "Let me tell you. T

SIGNS YOU PUT YOUR KID IN THE WRONG PRE-SCHOOL: * Child comes home without glasses claiming to have lost them in a game of "Lord of the Flies." * Your son thinks making hand-puppets requires a paper bag, some water paints, and no pants. * "OK, kids