747 full of lawyers: Q: Hear about the terrorist that hijacked a 747 full of lawyers? A: He threatened to release one every hour if his demands weren't met. A few good lawyers: A lawyer is standing in a long line at the box office. Suddenly, he feels a pair of hands kneading his shoulders, back, and neck. The lawyer turns around. "What the hell do you think you're doing?" "I An honest lawyer: Q: What do you call an honest lawyer? A: An oxymoron. Beautiful?: There was a lawyer and he was just waking up from anesthesia after surgery, and his wife was sitting by his side. His eyes fluttered open and he said, “You're beautiful! Blind bunny, meet blind snake: One morning a blind bunny was hopping down the bunny trail, and he tripped over a large snake and fell, KerPlop!, right on his twitchy little nose. "Oh, please excuse me!" said the bunny. "I didn't me Buried lawyers: Q: What do you have when 100 lawyers are buried up to their neck in sand? A: Not enough sand. Burried 10 feet under: Q: Why are lawyers buried 10 feet underground? A: Because deep down, they're really not that bad! C'mere pig: Q: What do you get when you cross a lawyer and a pig? A: Nothing. There are some things even a pig won't do! Catfish and lawyers: Q: What's the difference between a catfish and a lawyer? A: One's a slimy scum-sucking bottom-dwelling scavenger, the other is just a fish. Christmas bonus: Boss: Who said that just because I tried to kiss you at last month's Christmas party, you could neglect to do your work around here?Secretary: My lawyer. Contraception and lawyers: Q: What do lawyers use as contraceptives? A: Their personalities. |